11.17.2008

Part I: Keep Thy Religion to Thyself

Part I: Keep Thy Religion to Thyself.

There is quite a large stigma associated with being from our beautiful state of Utah. Anyone who has ever left the state knows what I mean. The moment you mention the state you originate from or reside in, you’re greeted with an odd question: “so…are you a Mormon?”
This may be the longest of my quasi-rants, but it’s the one I feel the strongest about. I’ll try my hardest to make it short and bitter (you thought I was gonna say “sweet”, didn’t you? Sucker.). The purpose of this is to expose the tyranny, lies, and social irrelevance of the most widespread, devastating, logic defying, and brainwashing plagues the world has or will ever know: Religion and the Theistic Tradition.
First, let me say that I’m not attacking you, personally. I’m expressing my disgust about the bullshit that a vast majority of us were fed starting when we were young enough to not know any better. We, as individuals, are vastly intelligent. It is amazing to me that so many hold so steadfastly to religion. And, yes, I hi-jacked the title of this from George Carlin. If anyone ever knew how shit worked, it was Carlin.
It’s also important to note that the term “Atheist” is not synonymous with “asshole.” Atheists can be assholes, so can non-Atheists. Lets face it, Christians, Jews, and Muslims can be assholes, too.
Second, some background information on me. I was born and raised as a Catholic, baptized, and confirmed. Each of these acts done against my will to satisfy my family. I immediately stopped going to church upon becoming confirmed. I’m now an Atheist. In addition to being an Atheist, I’m also an Anti-theist. I wouldn’t necessarily consider myself an asshole, but I may be biased.
From a purely logical standpoint, the stories that make up the Bible/Torah and Koran are impossible. Not improbable, impossible. Supernatural miracles do not happen. The story of Jesus is a series of allegorical myths copied from the pages of the pagan beliefs of the Greeks, Romans, Persians, Egyptians, and just about any other ancient civilization they could steal…err…borrow from. Don’t believe me, go look it up yourself and see the similarities among Mithra, Zoroaster, Dionysus, Attis, Krishna, Horus, Osiris, and Jesus the Christ. While you’re there, look up the similarities between Christianity and the pagan worship of the Sun. All of the aforementioned mythological figures share roughly the same life story of Jesus (these attributes including virgin birth on December 25th, 12 disciples, burial for 3 days and resurrection and performing of miracles), yet they pre-date Jesus by hundreds of years. Weird. Truth is, Jesus never existed. His tragic story was torn from the superstitions of the pagan masses, and it’s in his name that people are held hostage within themselves.
Religion makes you feel guilty and unworthy for natural desires and actions. Simply put, religion, especially Christianity, was dreamt up to for one reason: social control. Fear, guilt, and sorrow are built into religion because they are damn good weapons. If you control someone’s fears, you own them.
A quick history lesson: The great emperor Constantine said he saw a symbol in the sky from the Christian god and that’s what led him to victory in a crucial battle. He then used Christianity to unify the Roman Empire under one faith. He also orchestrated the 1st council of Nicaea (ny-see-uh), which set forth the belief structure for what would become the Catholic Church (see also: the Nicene Creed).
Sounds like a cool idea, but there were darker intentions behind this seemingly benevolent act. The Roman Empire was in shambles and wroth with civil war. He gave the newly formed Vatican huge amounts of power. Power they used to hold Europe and parts of Asia and Africa under their iron-fisted rule for hundreds of years. You see, the Vatican holds perhaps the most powerful weapon on its side: your eternal salvation. This, in turn, led to some of history’s darkest hours. Can anyone say: the Dark Ages, Spanish Inquisition, or the Crusades?
I won’t get into the story of Mormonism, because I’d be formally executed. Let’s face it, if you’ve heard the story of Joseph Smith and still believe it, you’re beyond help, and you probably didn’t read this far.
All history aside, there is a more practical reason to hate religion. Money. You think Snoop Dogg’s raking in the Benjamins? Religious institutions take in BILLIONS of dollars a year and pay ZERO taxes. What’s worse is they put you immortal soul on the line. Have you paid your salvation tax this week? Hmmm?
Now, organized religion aside, is spirituality a bad thing? In a word: no. Spirituality is ANY belief in the spirit world. It’s something that you believe and it isn’t preached. It doesn’t tell you who to love, hate, and it doesn’t divide people into groups. Not that I need to mention this, but EVERY religious group preaches some form of exclusion or separatism, or as I call it: hate. Don’t believe me? Ask gay people in California who were getting married until Prop 8 passed. Ask white people who heard the bullshit that Jeremiah Wright was preaching. Ask any minority who’s ever heard of the United Church of Christ Christian. Ask the Vatican about its consent of the slave trade, or its condemnation of homosexuality, open-mindedness and non-Christians.
When it all boils down, here’s my argument: in today’s world, you don’t need anything to make you feel worse about yourself, that’s what the media is for. We, as a people, don’t need to further divide ourselves into groups. We’re all humans, kids. Our differences are nothing compared to our similarities. Most of all, we don’t need to quiver at the feet of these soul-soliciting liars anymore. Always remember: faith is the surrender of reason.
After that beating, let’s end on a positive note, shall we? If you absolutely NEED to believe in God, who am I to take that from you? Here’s my advice: forget what you’ve been told. Forget the Bible, it’s not the word of God; it’s the word of MEN who wanted to be god. You don’t need anyone to tell you how to bond with whichever (fictional) creator you pray to. Do it for yourself and no one else.
If you’re going to believe in a God, believe in the god that’s inside each one of us: the power to do great and terrible things, the power to create and the power to destroy. The Bible says God created man in his image; that’s a fallacy. WE created god in ours.


“God is the answer for people who have no idea how the physical world works”
-Greg Graffin, PH.D, Lead Singer, Bad Religion

Prologue/Disclaimer

What follows is my view of the world. I will cut it up into relatively easy-to-read increments. I don’t expect everyone to agree. All I ask is that you read it with an open mind, and don’t get pissed off because you don’t agree. That’s what freedom of speech is about. If you feel that I’m so out of touch, jaded, or misguided that you simply must intervene, please let me know. If you’re a dick about it, I’ll be one back. Thanks.

I will cover many topics. These will include, but are not limited to: religion, spirituality & theism, the current & past political climates, foreign relations, gun control, alcohol & drugs, relationships, comedy, music, the undeniable similarities of the human race, and other things that pass through my often pissed off, but always open mind.

Here are some definitions that you may need to remember when reading what follows:

Manifesto- a public declaration of intentions, opinions, or purposes.
Music- an art form where sounds are organized in time.
Succinctly- to put something in a concise or brief manner.
Asshole- 1. a real prick. 2. a jiving, slippery motherfucker who really rubs humanity the wrong way. 3. my whoring, party-whore ex girlfriend.
Open minded- someone who is receptive to new ideas or information.
Athiest- someone who does not believe in any God, deity, or supreme being of any kind.
Anti-thiest- someone who is opposed to organized religion in any form.

Remember: I want your feedback, I want to know what you think. If you have something to say, say it. If possible, try not to be an asshole, if you can’t, then let me have it.

Stay tuned, kids. It’ll be a fun ride.